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    Why Jurassic "World" is actually garbage

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    I Meme Everything

    Nov-04-2017 4:06 PM

    Don't @ me if you like it. You enjoy this film, I'm not gonna stop you. But good luck getting me to change my opinion. Without further ado, let's get into why Jurassic World actually sucks...in my opinion.

     

    First off, the characters. They were bland and dislikable *looks at Zach and Gray.* I wouldn't have given a shit if any of them died, because I had no investment in any of these horrible characters. The only one who was even remotely interesting was Dr. Wu, but he was barely in the movie.

     

    I also have a gripe with the story. How could anyone get sick of dinosaurs? I was fine with the Indominus rex, but there is no way people would get tired of seeing dinosaurs. Zoos seem to be doing fine even though they've been around for years, so why would people get tired of dinosaurs?

     

    Then there's the subplots. The divorce between Zach and Gray's parents is completely irrelevant and only makes the film more bloated. Nobody gives a shit about Owen and Claire's failed relationship. Worst of all, there's the militarised dinosaurs bullshit. Dinosaurs would get slaughtered in the Middle East, so why send them into battle? The whole concept was just stupid anyway.

     

    The special effects are garbage and nothing compared to the ground breaking effects of the first movie. Jurassic World, or Jurassic Whore, as I will refer to it from now on, is also severely overrated. People say it's on par with and even better than Jurassic Park. While they're entitled to their own opinions, I personally think the movie's strong points (which it has none, except the last fight) are exaggerated beyond shit.

     

    The worst thing about this mindless f*ckery of a product was my personal experience with it. I first liked it upon inital release, and it led to my obsession with the franchise. But I was teased for liking it, because of my obsession. Because of a single movie that revived a movie series. The harassment I got for liking the film led to the worst part of my life, a stage in which I hated basically everything. You know what I'm talking about if you saw me in late 2016.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    16 Responses to Why Jurassic "World" is actually garbage

    Draegar: The Hooded Figure

    Nov-04-2017 4:14 PM

    Tyrannos,

    Although you at one point in time enjoyed the film, it should not have happened to you. Whatever your feelings and thoughts be towards Jurassic World in the future, I am certain I will remain to respect such.

    "Stories that end happily and tidily don't exist in real life. That's just fantasy."

    I Meme Everything

    Nov-04-2017 4:15 PM

    ^Thanks, and it's fine if you enjoy the movie.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Something Real

    Nov-04-2017 4:22 PM

    TYRANNOS - I can certainly understand and respect your stance with regards to Jurassic World, my friend. Do not worry: when the day breaks, the sun will shine out more clearly. :)

    Emperor GorillaGodzilla

    Nov-05-2017 11:37 AM

    I mean I don't think it's that bad, but it isn't that good either. What I'm not understanding is that you used to like it, but then stopped liking it because you were criticized for liking it?

    I would just start liking it more if that happened.

    Whatever it takes...

    I Meme Everything

    Nov-05-2017 11:41 AM

    ^Well, whenever I have a problem, I blame whatever caused the problem, and in this case, I traced it back to Jurassic World. It's kind of a crappy movie anyway.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Emperor GorillaGodzilla

    Nov-05-2017 12:00 PM

    I mean that's like being mocked for liking Spider Man and then stopping liking Spider Man because you were mocked for liking Spider Man.

    Kind of idiotic, isn't it?

    Whatever it takes...

    I Meme Everything

    Nov-05-2017 12:04 PM

    ^Well as I said, even without my personal experience, the movie kind of is crap.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Snake

    Nov-24-2017 4:27 PM

    It's craptastic for sure Tyrannos. I've only seen it 5 times now, including two viewings in theatre. I think it's a very lame attempt to resurrect the franchise and it pales compared to the original, a time when actual artists were working on the film and were treating the whole concept more seriously...

    Love: 

    - Nods and throwbacks to the original (old visitor centre, 'when dinosaurs ruled the earth'-banner, night vision goggles.)

    Like:

    - New JP-movie! Hooray!

    -Chris Pratt/ Bryce Dallas Howard

    Hate: 

    -Everything else...

    -Taming dinosaurs

    -Dumb humor

    -Smart-assy kids

    -Dinosaurs are boring?! 

    ...or could be used as reliable weapons?

    -Too much cgi, hardly any animatronics: Saw JP1 the other day, the best dinosaur-scenes are the ones where they used animatronics. Hands down. Cgi looks FAKE

    -The over the top final battle: Mosasaurus-ex-machina?! Absolute BULL + zero suspense. 

     

    They should make JP more serious and scary again so people will respect dinosaurs more. It shouldn't just be a flick for kids, but for adults as well, who grew up with this series.

     

    MU/TH/UR

    Nov-24-2017 5:09 PM

    I also hate it, almost as much as Force Awakens. The ending was god damn atrocious and had zero weight to it. They could've kept their not so original story while changing the game by making us follow everyday people trying to survive (Like The Mist or some parts of the G. Edwards' Godzilla).

    Also the new vid of Pratt petting a young raptor totally destroyed my hopes for the next one. I mean look at this , with minimal cgi enhancements (eyes for ex) it would work and be a 100% more realistic and also that video is from 2008!

    I'd rather have a puppet with little awkward movements than a full blown cgi beast that i know isn't there.

    I Meme Everything

    Nov-26-2017 5:44 PM

    I agree with you guys. It seems that the only person who can get this franchise out of the gutter is the man Spielberg himself.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Alphadino65

    Dec-03-2017 10:02 PM

    @Regent Tyrannos, it sucks that you were wrongfully criticized for JW.  Too often, people are cruel for no reason, and bullying is an ugly side of humanity.  My sympathies go out to you.

    And I know that there is no one on this planet who could change your cynical opinion of the movie into a positive one, other than yourself.  I accept that.

    But tell me this:  do you dislike those who bullied you for liking JW in the first place more than the movie itself?  Because the actual root of the problem was those idiots who bullied you.  THEY made the choice to bully you.  A film can't.

    I Meme Everything

    Dec-05-2017 3:49 AM

    ^Yes, I have more anger towards them than disdain towards the movie. But thank you.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    The Jurassic Bootleg

    Dec-05-2017 7:03 AM

    So you now hate the movie because of the harassment? No offense but that's pretty stupid, I would honestly just ignore them. But hey its your opinion so what can I do?

    Godzilla Generations was a beautiful game! I loved the fact that there's a laser cannon inside of Dr. Serizawa's eyepatch.

    I Meme Everything

    Dec-05-2017 11:41 AM

    ^Putting the harassment aside, I still think the characters are bland and annoying, and the movie distracts us from itself with subplots.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    AV8er

    Dec-11-2017 9:24 PM

    Why I like Jurassic park movies:

    dinosaurs

     

    why I don’t watch Jurassic park

    deep undeelying plots about relationships, the controversies, etc. 

     

    that at being said I agree with a lot of your points except for boring. What would you change to have dinosaurs not eating people boring? The scene with indominus chasing the kids where the jumped was awesome. I feel like the chase should have been longer, like the extra scare from the spinosaurus in jp3 when he broke through the fence. 

     

    Thr final fight right scene was crazy and I loved it. It was interesting to see them actually releasing a dinosaur. 

     

    I liked the actors. Don’t care for sub plots necessarily, just wanna see people run from dinosaurs. That’s my 2 cents. I do want more horror though, like when in the first movie they run through the underground security station to turn the power on and the raptors chased the girl. (Forgive me for forgetting names). I want scarier scenes. I would love a rated r movie. But you know, I wouldn’t have watched the first one as a kid if it was rated r so.. yeah.

     

    snyways I can’t wait for more dinosaurs.

    paynasaur

    Jan-01-2018 12:40 PM

    I kinda like the film. Mainly cos it's part of the jurrasic park series lol. But has bad choices.

     

    For me the raptor training should of been shown in the film close to the beginning. But gone horribly wrong! And the raptors are ordered to be destroyed as they are to risky to have on the island with multiple failed training attempts. Owen is asked to leave the raptors But asked to help with the parks "new project". He is left thinking about it as he's not to sure he wants anymore to do with the island. There would be 6 raptors though.

    Now I would of gone 6 months later to show the park full of tourists etc. With showing the dinos along side the mega jurassic park entrance music, ending on the rex being shown. Not playing the music whilst showing buildings. :/

    I would of had the point of view of a family visiting the park, showing of more of the park. mum dad couple of kids. Non related to anyone who works there! Parents get killed during the breakout and kids get saved.

    In terms of the i-rex getting out. It should of ripped it's GPS out in the paddock and whilst in its mouth would of tossed it clear over the paddock walls. And is found by a worker who then reports the problem. And they think the i-rex has escaped that way. And like in the film open up the paddock it gets out, and you shouldn't get the see all of the beast till later on makes it more suspenseful, it should also of escaped at night time.

    The i-rex releases the not yet destroyed raptors. And they go on the rampage. All raptors bar one gets killed by the solders who are then killed by the i-rex which used the raptors as bait/distraction to do so.

    T-rex and I-rex fight screen to carry on with the raptor getting revenge or the loss of its pack as original.

    Don't know what else I would change. 

    But would be a lot darker and less cartoony.

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