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    Why Jurassic Park III Sucks

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    I Meme Everything

    Feb-19-2018 8:52 AM

    I already did why Jurassic World sucks, so with Jurassic Park III being the other worst in the series, this was bound to happen. I'm gonna keep this intro short, so here's why Jurassic Park III sucks.

     

    The characters are unbearable. Amanda Kirby is one of, if not the absolute worst character in the entire series, and Paul isn't much better. She takes out a megaphone and screams her son's name. On an island. Populated by dinosaurs. There's Billy, who is good at first, until he steals the Raptor eggs like a greedy boi. The only character I like is Alan Grant, but he's a shadow of the great character he was in the first film. When he finds out that Billy has the eggs, HE KEEPS THEM.

     

    There's the plot. Again, humans go to an island with dinosaurs, but here, the reason is very weak. The Kirby family's son is stranded on the island when he was with their friend. This makes Paul and Amanda look very dumb and irresponsible. I know humans are flawed, but these two are just idiots.

     

    The movie also has moments that are just dumb. Alan has a dream about a talking Raptor, which is very corny and doesn't belong in a Jurassic Park movie. Of course, there's the polarising fight between the T.rex and the Spinosaurus. Not only is the fight thirty seconds of BS, but it split the dinosaur fanbase, which brings me to the final reason.

     

    It created Spino fanboys. These obnoxious kids have been plaguing me and my friends on YouTube for much of 2017, which is partially why Spinosaurus dropped down to the lower end of my top ten favourite dinosaurs for a while. Spinosaurus fanboys act like S.aegyptiacus is some sort of deity, even though no dinosaur is. They also blindly hate T.rex, but I think that no animal deserves hate. The fanboys also will go apeshit if you say that another dinosaur, which doesn't even have to be a Rex, can kill a Spino. Because of this movie and JW, I'm gonna stop following the JP series if Fallen Kingdom sucks.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    10 Responses to Why Jurassic Park III Sucks

    Ultrazero80

    Feb-19-2018 8:58 AM

    I have nostalgic memories of this movie, but I do think it's the weakest in the franchise.

    Godzilla... Truly a God incarnate.

    SuckerNumber2

    Mar-06-2018 1:21 PM

    ohhhh i get it, your the jurassic park version of the gen oners from the pokemon franchise.

    i personally love all of the movies. i just like to sit back and watch and have fun. if there is a movie i hate but people want to watch it i just dont think about it, just ignore its flaws, every movie has them, just let them do what they are meant to do. ENTERTAIN!

    Emperor GorillaGodzilla

    Mar-11-2018 6:59 PM

    It's just a horrible movie through and through.

    Whatever it takes...

    I Meme Everything

    Mar-11-2018 7:01 PM

    ^Agreed.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Sci-Fi King25

    Mar-12-2018 3:13 PM

    I personally think it’s an okay movie but the Kirbys except for Eric are some of the worst characters from the series, and the plot could’ve been better. Tbh, I don’t mind the Spinosaurus winning. I think the fight should’ve been at least a couple minutes long. 

    “Banana oil.”- George Takei, Gigantis: The Fire Monster

    SuckerNumber2

    Mar-13-2018 1:00 PM

    sci fi king. your right,plus its very excepted that the T-rex was a juvinile which explains a lot

    I Meme Everything

    Mar-30-2018 11:21 AM

    SFK I don't understand how Eric is able to survive on Isla Sorna. I wouldn't mind the Spinosaurus winning if it didn't create a f*cking war.

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    Sci-Fi King25

    Mar-30-2018 12:36 PM

    ^It helped that he found an old truck to live in. 

    “Banana oil.”- George Takei, Gigantis: The Fire Monster

    I Meme Everything

    Mar-31-2018 8:16 AM

    And no, I'm not a JP Genwunner. I enjoy the first two movies (yeah that's right, I like TLW:JP).

    "Part of the journey is the end..."

    G. H. (Gman)

    Mar-31-2018 9:51 AM

    Considering all the production woes and studio interference this movie went through I'm fairly impressed that the end result was coherent at all. For a time I felt this movie was better than the fourth one, but after rewatching the entire series, I think Jurassic World edges it out--It's pretty neck-n-neck.

    Still, I don't think the movie is particularly bad, but it suffers from an extremely thin narrative, which couldn't have been helped--Poor Johnston was shooting this film while the screenplay was practically being written. He did the best he could under the conditions and was really excellent with the damage control.

    --
    "It wouldn't be a true Godzilla film if you didn't touch upon those things. Anyone who thinks otherwise is not a true Godzilla fan." - Mike Dougherty, fellow gatekeeper-elitist ;)


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